Number twenty-nine in a series.
What's your secret to staying so beautiful?
I stay beautiful by bathing in toxic waste. It leaves my skin glowing clean and removes skin blemishes and, of course, the skin itself. My lips have been injected with yeast which is far more effective than collagen and has a nice yeasty aroma. My teeth have been made a lustrous dark yellowish brown by chewing only the finest beef jerky. But my favorite beauty secret is my hair. I keep it clean. I keep it smelling fresh. I keep it in my top drawer.- Is it true what the tabloids are saying about your relationship?
No, I always wear underpants, especially when getting in and out of limousines. My relationship with Heather Locklear is our own private business. It is one of mutual respect, for each other and the teachings of Aleister Crowley. Since my divorce from Halle Berry, we have maintained the closest of relationships and occasionally get together to discuss our careers, debate politics and to have nasty animal sex, usually involving a nasty animal. - This new project of yours is certainly taking everyone by surprise. Tell us about it.
"Voideville - The Last Show On Earth" is a labor of love. It is a "variety" show that takes place in the future, after the tragic events of 9/11 and 2/12, but before the even more tragic events of 6/14, 3/22, 5/28 and 1/11. Consisting of acts uncovered in the rubble of what is left of New York City, it provides the last vestige of what passes for entertainment. People are so desperate for diversion in these trying times that they'll even appreciate crap like "Voideville". We have every kind of entertainer from a lion tamer to Dildo The Clown and special guest stars for each and every show. Created by myself and Ruby Lynn Reyner, it was first performed in 1979. It's back now, more inappropriate than ever and twice as sick. Three weeks only! Performances begin Feb.1. - Who are you wearing?
Funny you should ask. I am wearing a stunning outfit created by designer Lola Naisse, the costume designer for "Voideville". It consists of fabric culled from the many remnants found floating in New York Harbor during those dark days following the Golden Globe Awards. - Would you ever do a role that required nudity?
I would only do a role that required nudity, as long as it is tasteful, necessary, dirty and someone else's body. The only time I ever show my own naked body is in Central Park on weekends to Japanese tourists.
Learn more about Gordon at Voideville at the Theater for the New City, running three weeks, starting February 1.
