Something arrogant inside of me makes me think I give good advice. Advice that is cold and logical and not emotion-driven, but at the same time compassionate to the person asking. In a world where Doctor Phil gives weight-loss advice and Oprah gives love advice and Kimora Lee Simmons gives fashion advice, surely there is a place for me.
My advice column would be an Add Vice column. (And yes, addvice.com is already taken.) Ignoring typical mores and social norms. Telling people in relationships where the other half is a coke-head to get that other half some crystal. Telling someone that suspects that they are a sex addict that in reality they are just bored. Telling women to treat their men like gay men do.
There's probably some $10K Mediabistro class on starting up an advice column, but I'm short that by about $11K. But the world, quite certainly, needs me.
To build up a portfolio, I'll just put it out there. Ask me. Send questions to AddVice AT manhattanoffender DOT com. All questions will be answered.
