Manhattan Offender

Live-blogging Oscar

7:40pm - A pot-luck for the Academy Awards?  Okay.  But, um, where are are guests?  Roro is what?  Sick?  And the others are on their way?  But I'm hungry.

7:45pm - There was just a video montage of romantic movements of nominated films in the past year.  It was okay to see with a PROSTITUTE and her trick.  It was okay to show a romantic scene with a woman and an APE.  But no romantic scene with two men.  It's going to be a long night.

8:02pm - First shot of the stage.  The font for "Oscar" looks like a soda logo.

8:04pm - Billy Crystal and Chris Rock?  George Clooney in bed with Jon Stewart?  It's gonna' be the gayest Oscars ever.

8:10pm - Charlize Theron may be the best looking woman of the night.

8:12pm - Brokeback Mountain joke count - 1 (a big one)

8:20pm - George Clooney just arrived on the stage and the music is already playing?  What is that about?

The Oscar ballots are in

Last night ballots for Academy Award nominees were due.  The votes will be counted and on Sunday, the winners will be announced.  As we did for the Grammy Awards, we'll be having some of our people over to view the festivities.  Last-time it was a tailgate party; this time a pot-luck.

And of course, for some reason, this will be live-blogged.  Honestly, it seems an attempt of my friends to keep me busy so that perhaps my mouth will occasionally not be wildly flying.  Or maybe they think that it will keep me sober.  The fools.

After the jump, the list of all nominees, with my retarded picks in bold.  (Really, they are retarded.  Only five or six of all the movies listed even found my eyes last year.  And where is Thumbsucker or Gay Sex in the Seventies or any of the other films I actually did see, anyway?)