Manhattan Offender

For $40 you can totally celebrate how horrible and pathetic your life truly is by living the life of a vicarious Gossip Girl.

Because of "blogging", my mailbox is germinated with far too many press releases.  Below, please find the worst received in recent memory, presented without commentary, as it is not necessary.  Then pity my poor mailbox.  And me.  (The spacing errors et al are from the email, not me.)

For immediate release                                                                                  Contact:  Cathy Wilke

April 2009                                                                                                         Phone:   (212) 683-3516

 

Experience a Day in the Life of

Manhattan

’s Elite on the Tour of Gossip Girl Sites

Hello Upper East Siders and Gossip Girl Fans!  Enter the playground of the privileged prep school teens on a brand new tour of Gossip Girl Sites, courtesy of On Location Tours.

Live a day in the life of Serena, Blair, Chuck, Dan, Vanessa, and Nate on this three hour guided bus tour that goes to more than 30 locations that were used in filming the hit TV series.  Find out behind the scenes information and little known facts about the cast and crew of Gossip Girl from local

New York City

actors and actresses who are the guides on this exciting tour.

 

• Visit the New York Palace Hotel, home to the Bass and Van der Woodson families where so many of the scenes from Gossip Girl take place.
• Be "spotted" by that most ubiquitous blogger at the

  Constance

  Billard

  School

  for Girls/St. Jude School for Boys.
• See the lavish

  Fifth Avenue

  building that Blair Waldorf calls home.
• Shop at Henri Bendel where Blair and Serena shop.
• Get a glimpse of Eleanor Waldorf’s shop in the meatpacking district
• Go past the restaurant where Dan and Serena have their second date.

 

The tour costs $40 per person and runs on Fridays and Sundays at noon. Tours depart from in front of the Palace Hotel. Private tours are available at any time.  Advance purchase is required, as tours usually sell out. Tickets can be purchased online at www.screentours.com or by calling Zerve at (212) 209-3370.

 

On Location Tours, Inc. is the world leader in TV and Movie tours.  Based in

New York City

, On Location Tours also operates tours of Sex and the City Hotspots, Sopranos Sites,

New York

TV and Movie Sites,

Washington

DC TV and Movie Sites, and Central Park Movie Sites.  The company was founded in 1999, by Georgette Blau, a 1996 graduate of

Skidmore

College

.

 

While I'm not sure how I ended up with it, here is the scoop on the Gossip Girl spin-off.

The Gossip Girl spin-off, possibly the most poignant television ever, will be kicked off with this season's finale showing flashbacks of young Lily in Los Angeles of the 1980's.  Strangely enough, an actress friend auditioned for the role of the young Lily.  Wait, let's retype that.  Strangely enough, and in a move reminiscent of the 96-year old Blake Lively* playing a teen, a 24-year old actress friend auditioned for the role of 15-year old Lily.  As it peaked my interest I asked her a few questions:

"Fifteen?  Wow, that's younger than I expected."

"I know, right.  But yeah, she's definitely 15."

"No offense, but can you ..."

"Oh, I know.  I reminded my agent that I'm 24.  She was, like, no problem.  They want you to auditon, so I went."

"So, how was it?"

"It took forever, but they were nice enough."

"And the writing."

"Sucked.  Totally."

"But you would've taken it."

"Yeah.  Of course!"


*As a fellow not-aging-amazingly person-of-no-color, I can say that, okay?

Status

Rod has realized that his friend E is Chack Bass, his friend A is Blair, and he is Serena.

Dan Humphrey and me

It's just occurred to me that this guy with whom I've gone on a couple dates speaks in a similar cadence to that of Penn Badgely's character on Gossip Girl.  It's that sort of "thinking about what one is saying before one says it" cadence that, to me, seems studied and thought out and damn sexy.  Also?  He has that same clear baritone.  Not the garrulous growl of some chain-smoking art-fag, but just this steady basso.

Granted, if he knew that I watched the season finale of Gossip Girl, that voice would probably never be heard again, so enough on this.  Serena?  Blair?  Chuck?  Never heard of them.  Vanessa? Lily? Bart?  Really, not a clue.  Darota? Katy? Isobel?  Ugh.

Gossip Gaffes: Your Silvercup runneth over

Gossip Girl may be the most high profile show shooting in Manhattan, but it's making mistakes.  In order to help Josh Schwartz successfully navigate Serena and Blair through the city, Gossip Gaffes will present the each episode's biggest New York no-no and advise how to correct it.  You know you love me.

The latest episode sees Blair through the up of being chosen as the model for her mother's clothing line and the down of finding out that her mother (following the advice of everyone) changes her mind and chooses Blair's frenemy Serena.  As the line is about to debut at Henri Bendel, Ms. Waldorf places the success of the photo shoot over the fragile heart of her daughter.  Ignore the fact that Waldorf's fashion line looks frightfully fragmented (too many looks, colors and cuts for a cohesive in-store boutique at Bendel's for sure).  And ignore the fact that hiring an inexperienced model is cost prohibitive as you will end up wasting roll upon roll on poorly executed poses.  Mother Waldorf commits the biggest gaffe in her choice of shoot locations.

Silvercup Studios is a gem.  A longtime resident of Long Island City, the studio has stuck it out as the neighborhood has been given the blemishes of multiple strip clubs, prostitution and the famous Rikers Island bus.  But it is becoming a bit overly recognized as a setting.  Tony Soprano sat under the view of the Queensboro Bridge.  As did Carrie and her minions.  More recently Tina Fey is seen in an office inside the studio in an American Express commercial.  That Gossip Girl, which is shooting interiors at Silvercup would use the roof as a shoot location is as unsurprising as it is lazy.

The problem isn't the general overuse of the location with it's clear views of the Midtown skyline.  It's the use of this setting for a photo shoot that is supposed to represent a high-fashion campaign.  What was once a special view of the city has become generic from too-frequent visits from film and camera crews.  The focus on the clothing would be taken away by the "Hey, isn't that ..." effect.

Several other local opportunities would be available for a more ambitious location scout.  (I'm looking at you Heather Gauntt!)   Just  a few blocks away is PS1 or the Graffiti Museum or the the largest fortune  cookie factory in the United States.  All of which would have provided a more high-fashion setting appropriate to Henri Bendel as opposed to the Macy's One Day Sale catalog scene provided.

It's the little details that count Gossip Girl so keep your eyes out for these fantastic city nuances.  Because we're worth it.

Gossip Gaffes: Actually, this is so right, it's wrong

Gossip Girl may be the most high profile show shooting in Manhattan, but it's making mistakes.  In order to help Josh Schwartz successfully navigate Serena and Blair through the city, Gossip Gaffes will present the each episode's biggest New York no-no and advise how to correct it.  You know you love me.

Gossip Gaffes: The near-death of Serena van der Woodsen

Gossip Girl may be the most high profile show shooting in Manhattan, but it's making mistakes.  In order to help Josh Schwartz successfully navigate Serena and Blair through the city, Gossip Gaffes will present the each episode's biggest New York no-no and advise how to correct it.  You know you love me.

Never mind Blair telling Jenny the color of that dress was last season.  (That electric blue was actually three seasons ago.)  Never mind the Bass family owning The Palace, which I believe is a Helmsley property (although I could be wrong on this).  This week's biggest Manhattan mistake was a simple one, but it could have left Serena dead.  Dead!

As Jenny, Dan and Serena end their night after the ill-fated "Kiss on the Lips" party, Serena is dropped off at The Palace Hotel.  After an awkward goodbye, Serena exits the cab, opening the door into oncoming traffic.  Although this is occasionally acceptable, especially late at night on Madison Avenue, the fact that she simply opens the door without looking is complicated by her exiting the cab without looking. 

In reality, the cab driver screams at her.  Horns blare.  Passing drivers yell, "Stupid bitch!"  The door is hit by another taxi barreling down the avenue at fifty or so, resulting in a shoulting match between the drivers, who then turn on Serena and shake her down for cold cash.

The proper way to navigate the exit is to pre-plan who is getting out first before getting in the cab.  If this is not possible, then everyone exits to the curb, allowing the far passenger to exit, say awkward adieus, and then pile back into the taxi to the bitter impatient stare of the driver.

It's the nuances of Manhattan that matter.  Following those nuances will take Gossip Girl from "OC on the East River" to a true New York moment.

Gossip Girl: The rape and murder of Manhattan

By now, no doubt, you’ve seen the most important TV show about Manhattan ever. You Tivo’d it or you DVR’d it or picked it up off of your favorite torrent client. (You watched it live? Retro!) And having viewed it, hopefully you’ve marked the date in your calendar to remember forever the day. The day Manhattan died.

Denuded by Gossip Girl, the city becomes the Plain Jane of cities. Locations become irrelevant and interchangeable. Mentions of Henri Bendel or Bergdorf, formerly fab and now more generically aspirational carry little weight or nuance. The Palace Hotel is likewise a broad concept of luxury free of the burden of history or character.