Following is a letter sent to friends in Jackson Heights after having dinner in their home last night:
Thanks for the company for dinner last night.
I left your place and turned toward Trade Fair so I could stop by Citibank on the way home. A guy caught my eye and I gave him a quick once over. He didn’t look my way, but another guy (less attractive) noticed me noticing the other guy and started following me. At the first corner I was able to cross the street with the light and I had thought him gone. At the next corner he caught up to me.
He was very country-bumpkin type Latino with very sweet eyes and smile, but not really attractive. To nip it in the bud, I quickly told him that I didn’t live nearby and that I was on my home. This confused him so we switched to Spanish for the rest of the conversation. He then offered to walk me to the subway, to which I agreed. By this point I was pretty amused.
As we walked down the street, he attempted to rub my butt. A lot. There were no people behind us, but still I told him that his behavior was inappropriate. I also told him that if he wanted my attention, he should rub me on the front side. He followed me into the Citibank and stood next to me as I transacted. At this point he rubs me in the front and I get a boner, as one does when rubbed in the front. I tell him that now I have to hide that as I continue on the way home.
He asks me to walk into Vaseline Alley and I decline. He asks for my phone number and I decline. He mentions my neighborhood is very close and I agree that it is, but tell him that I’m quite tired. He asks if he can give me a hug and I say, “Yeah, sure.” He tries during the hug to impress me with his tumescent wiener and fails.
I wished him a good night and got on the subway.
Your neighborhood; it is very you.