Manhattan Offender

Let's get busy this weekend

Wow.  That was a fast week.  As New York City hit 10.4%, suddenly all those Facebook statuses went from "at the beach" to "considering getting a new roommate".  Fashion Week was just a thing in the peripery vision of the masses since most houses cut their "party budgets" and the fashion shows brought more yawning than fawning.  Oh, and your cocaine is tainted.  What to do?

Friday night: 

• Remember last fall?  Friday was difficult to navigate as everybody and their sistah had a party going.  Now?  Not so much, but the strong have survived.  Snaxx is up and running at Westside Tavern, and there's free beer from 10 to 11.
• If you're wearing your mittens on cold, cold Fire Island maybe going to see Robbyne Kaamil's show at the Ice Palace will heat you up.  And Daniel Nardicio is throwing lots of parties and probably a yard sale to close out the season.
• If you're taller than 54", you can take Superman for a ride at gay night at Six Flags in New Jersey.  
• Once you're back from vomiting on a roller coaster, you can gag on the price of drinks at Highline Ballroom at Blowoff with the hairy heavies.  (Twenty dollars!?!?)
• Better?  Go to this Housing Works benefit.  Andrew Krucoff organized it.  People seem to swoon for him.

Saturday night:

• Just go to Rocket at The Hose.  Ryan and Ashton put the poo in shampoo.
• But first, check out Scooter LaForge's gallery show of monsters and tee shirts at Envoy Enterprises (131 Christie Street) from 6 to 9!  Ha-ha.  6ty9.  
• And before all that, work out a budget for the fall.  Ben Bernanke might be saying "The Recession is Over", you know he meant to say OVAH.  Watch your pennies, Penny!

Sunday

• I'm going to a museum every Sunday until I don't.  Last Sunday it was the Michael Arad exhibition at MOMA.  This weekend I'm stopping in to check out the landscape architecture exhibition, In Situ.  If the weather is crap, I'll be checking to see if Baz Luhrman's Romeo and Juliet has stood the test of time.
• New York's sexiest person (according to Time Out), Justin Bond is giving new show at Joe's Pub.  Yay!
• Those Sea Tea tours leave me wanting to swim to land after the first hour, but the heavy hairy crowd is doing one Sunday.  Apparently there is a free buffet.
• I prefer a boat to take me somewhere, not drift aimlessly.  Taking a ferry to the ongoing (and awesome) New Island Festival is an option.  You could even stay and dance for the very popular Freemason's gig.  (Forty dollars!!  Bernanke must be right!)
• Also?  Pink!, a play about twelve-year old girls at sleepaway camp!  It's not as innocent as it sounds.  This is the final weekend, so check it out!

Or just stay home and organize files on your computer.  Or organize your DVD's.  Mercury is back in retrograde, so good luck with whatever you decide.  Meanwhile, here's a theme song, to get you through.

Name dropped? Really?

ON THE PHONE, AT HOME, EARLY EVENING FRIDAY

Dan:  I read your name today.
Me:  My site?  I haven't posted to it forever.
Dan:  No, your name.  Writer Rod Townsend in the East Village.
Me:  But I don't live in ...
Dan:  No, it was about the East Village and how you're ... hold on, I'll grab it.
Me:  What is 'it'?
Dan:  Oh, Time Out.  The East Village issue.  Here.  Wait ... Okay, "The Hose, Who you'll see:  Guys in muscle tees and trucker hats, writer Rod Townsend, DJ Josh Sparber and Justin Bond (one half of Kiki & Herb)".
Me:  Why would anybody care where or what Rod Townsend goes or does?  Did they quote somebody?
Dan:  No, it's just ...
Me:  Who wrote it?
Dan:  Leslie Price.
Me:  Is that a girl or a guy?
Dan:  It doesn't really say.  It's not a big deal and it's not why I called anyway.  About the beach tomorrow, ...

As it's the first time I've seen my name in print in such a manner, it has me a little confused.  This is not a person "on the scene" for sure; it says so in my ManHunt profile.  My recommendation for just about anything is not something one would typically follow.  As for The Hose, well, yes, I've been there a lot, especially for the now defunct MooseKnuckle.  (Also, pictured in the article is Scott Anthony, so maybe there is some technophile thing going there.)  It did sort of encourage me to start writing again, so, um, thanks?

New York magazine uses its "Best of" weapon to try to destroy The Hose.

"Hey, the New York Magazine Best of New York issue is out."
"Is it March already?"
"Yeah, and look, The Hose totally made it."
"Made what?"
"Yes, look!  'Best Gay Bar.' Isn't it great?"
"Uh, no."
"What are you talking about?  You love The Hose!  Didn't you go-go dance for them on the opening night?"
"Yes."
"And aren't you thrilled for Paul Short, one of the sweetest party promoters in town?"
"Yes."
"So what's the ..."
"I totally saw New York's 'gay' reporter at The Hose one night, doing his research.  Granted, I was in 'force of nature' mode by that point, so I don't remember it well, but I could kick myself for not having spilled a drink on him or sent a troll his way to way to ruin his evening."
"Tim Murphy, right?  Why would you want to ruin his evening?"
"Because I'm shy."
"What? You're not ..."
"Fine, I'm exclusive."
"You're losing me."
"I don't like places that 'everyone' goes to.  And it's not some 'cool' thing as I'm decidedly uncool."
"It's a 'cool' thing."
"No, it's just I like to be around people of a like mind.  And I hate crowds."
"It's a 'cool' thing."
"Fuck you."
"Not even with your dick.  So you totally aren't happy for Paul and Kiger and Dustin and Juan and Ashton and Ryan and everybody else involved with The Hose?  And you're never going to go there again?  Right."
"Oh, I'll go.  Well, maybe."
"Maybe?  Weren't you talking about go-going there again sometime soon?"
"Yeah, and I totally will, but they'll ... There's one thing they'll have to do."
"Drink tickets?"
"Oh, that'd be nice."
"But what's this 'one thing'?"
"Um.  Two words:  Restrictive Door."